Friday, October 18, 2013

10 Minute Visit


Colin is going on day 4 tomorrow at the psych hospital with minimal progress. He is very stubborn and has only opened up a little bit. His version of why he is there: Sounds are merely an annoyance and he is in there because he screams at his parents to get back at them. Our crime is not leaving him alone and taking him to doctors against his will. He raged and refused to get dressed for the trip to the Neurologist and Psychiatrist  merely to embarrass us.

Our son is very angry and hates us right now. Thursday,  we were supposed to have a meeting with the social worker and my son. Instead he stayed in his room. He was supposed to write out a plan. Instead it was a Hate List. He basically said he hates us, will never love us again and doesn't trust us. He doesn't care if he costs us lots of money and will stay there for a year. (not possible, this is a short-term facility).

As we don't have Mental Health insurance, there is concern by the social worker and psychiatrist in getting our son out soon. Together we decided that my husband & I need to be able to spend time in the same room as my son. Later that day we were to come back for 10 minutes of togetherness. We didn't have to talk, but he needed to be in the same room. I even wrote a note.

My husband & I thought there would be a nurse facilitating but instead we were left on our own. We found our son holed-up in his bathroom trying to keep us out. He left his room and we followed. I turned into a game of follow the leader. The only intervention was the nurse finally blocking a doorway so he was stuck between his room and the hallway. No interaction other than ripping up my note and trying to push us out of his room. The nurse was a bit sympathetic and I told her that this does not count as 10 minutes. My husband left a message for the social worker to let her know we are disappointed on how things went.

At over $3,000 a day, they can not get my son to take meds, he is polite with the nurses and staff but keeps mainly to himself. His roommate needs music to sleep so my son has been sleeping in different conference rooms (sitting up with his head on a chair) and last night the isolation room. If he is sent home right now, not much will change. The Behavioral Psych, who we originally went to see, knows our social worker and our hospital Psychiatrist and has indicated to them he would be willing to work with our son.

Right now I feel angry towards my son and don't want him back in our home if he will continue to be disrespectful and unable to politely communicate with us. (I'm o.k. if he doesn't like us for now). We will no longer continue to enable his bad behavior. I have approached my sister about taking my son in (she would) but she lives 40 minutes from us.

The sad part is that before this summer when we discovered his miso, he was a great child and gave us no problems.

Friday Morning:

This morning I called my son's nurse on duty. Apparently after we left last night, the nurse we thought was being passive went into Colin's room and told him he was being a brat. He was surprised at being scolded.
Our son is still refusing medication and the staff is still encouraging and challenging his views and actions. It is a slow process.

I was planning to stay away until my son was more conciliatory but was convinced otherwise by a call from  the social worker this afternoon. She wants us to keep visiting and to make sure we are in our son's face. He needs to know he is not in control anymore. The social worker also asked for my sister's contact information in case we need her to take Colin in.

On a more positive note: My husband spent some time on the phone with the insurance company. Some of the bills may be coded with P.D.D which is Autism. If Colin is on the spectrum, the insurance company has to cover up to $35,700. That would certainly ease the burden.

Stay tuned.......

We are a work-in-progress!

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